"Are they cousins?"

We have not gotten too many crazy questions yet, so I am glad about that!  The second day the kids were home we took our family of 5 out to the store and the cashier said "wow, looks like you just had them one after another!".  I replied with "something like that".  Sometimes I have no idea what to say. 
When do we tell our story, when do we just brush it off?  How do we explain our family to people?  Do we have to say Alex is adopted?  Should we just say that the two are our foster kids, and leave Alex out of it?  Do we have to explain how they are related?
When the woman asked if they were cousins I told more than I wanted to!  I told her we adopted Alex at birth.  I said they were his brother and sister and that we are fostering them.  I said it is unclear about the father of Alex, which might be why he has red hair.  Sometimes when I start to tell our story I don't know where to stop, or what to leave out.  The person who asked the question this time was a worker where we get the kids pictures done.  They had seen us a few times with only Alex, and I felt I needed to explain how I ended up with two more this time!  In the end I was happy with what I said, because the worker said she had always wanted to adopt, and that she likes to hear other peoples story's. 
The same weekend is when I took the kids for hair cuts.  The woman was asking about how to cut "big boys" hair because of this crazy "whirly something", she said he has in the back of his hair.  I could not think of how to tell her that I did not know if he had ever had his hair short, without explaining our situation.  I had also made a comment that Alex has the same thing, so I went on to explain that they are brothers, but "big boy" had only been with us for three weeks.  In the end we went short with it, and it looks really cute!

It's always so uncomfortable when we get asked questions about our kids.  I never know what to say, how much to say, or how little to say.  On top of that, I never like to say much, if our kids are right there.

If you have any advice for me on this subject I would love to hear it!  Maybe there is a good book, or blog post that you can direct me to.

 Mark this as another thing that was not covered in our training, but maybe it should be!

Ten on Tuesday

Ten on Tuesday, because I don't have time for a real post! 

1. This week is court week, which means it's going to be a crazy week!  There is not one day this week that we do not have something going on.  There are visits to the house, visits outside of the house, appointments, paperwork, and not to mention court!
2. Today marks four weeks that the kids have been in our home!  Things started to fall into place, but I think it's going to be a little up-side-down now until after court, or even into next week.
3. My brother's wife had their baby Monday morning!  I have seen pictures but have not gotten to hold him, or see him in person yet.  They are over an hour north of me, and I can't wait to get up there this weekend. 
4. One of my other sisters (and Alex's godmother) is due this weekend!  Maybe there will be another new baby to meet, when I get back from seeing my brother's new baby!  It's going to be so fun having these two new baby boys around this summer! 
5. "Big boy" is doing great going on the potty, and so was "princess".  It seems she was not able to keep up the progress at school today.  We will be putting her back into pull-ups until things return to "normal" next week.
6. Alex is doing great!  He is saying new words everyday, and seems to be poping out new teeth at the same rate. He has 11 right now, and I think there will be another one any minute.  He is adjusting well to the new kids at home.  He is starting to play with them more, and he is even watching and learning from them which is fun to see!
7. I took the three kids to have their hair cut on Friday night.  I will never do that by myself again!!!
8. We got the kids pictures taken together on Saturday.  Alex was not giving up a smile for anything.  The other two were total hams!  I will always treasure these pictures of the three of them together!
9. While checking out at the end of our session two of the workers went on about how cute the kids were, then one asked me if they were cousins!  At first I didn't know what to say, and wondered what gave her the idea that they were not all mine, or not even siblings.  Was it Alex's red hair compared to the other kids blonde locks, did she over hear one of them call us by our name (although Alex still does that too, so not a dead give away), or did I say something that let her in on our "secret".  It got me thinking about how to respond to questions like that, and so I will be working on a post about it.

10.  I have two long weekends coming up, and I can not wait!  I need some time off.  I have so much on my plate right now, and I am in need of some time to get things done!  I just hope I am able to use that time to get things accomplished!

Today you are in my heart!  Today my heart hurts for you!  On the day above you gave us a gift that we could not give ourselves! 

I feel lucky to get to spend tomorrow with 3 special little ones, but I can't stop thinking about what you must be feeling. I feel so bad for you, and everything you are going through.  Although I will have all of the children tomorrow, we will still send our love and a prayer to you on Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's day to you and to me!  Without you I would not be celebrating tomorrow!

We love you!

First of many

Last night we had our first home visit as foster parents with foster kids in the home.  It went well I think. 

A few things come to mind that did not go very well!  One is my dogs.  They love to bark.  When the social worker first got to our home I quick grabbed up the dogs, and slipped them in the backyard.  After about ten minutes of them barking outside, Joe let them in.  I would have liked to just keep them out.  As soon as they came in Hero ran to sniff the stranger in the house, and Baxter stood back and barked at her.  Once Baxter found that she was fine he jumped right up into her lap even though she had paperwork in her hands and on her lap.  I tried to get him down, and I apologized.  She said it was ok, and that she likes dogs.  My dogs have NO manners though, and I am always embarrassed when we have new people over! 
The other small issue was not our foster children, but our own child!  He was running around like a wild man!  First he had no shirt on, only a onesie and jeans, because I gave him chocolate milk for the first time and he spilled some on his shirt right before the SW came over.  Then he was running from room to room, plowing into me and Joe, standing up to the window banging on the glass, picking up random things and throwing them, and just being nuts!  I know 16 month olds can be unpredictable, but he had gone off the deep end!  lol I don't think the social worker noticed though, as she mostly had her nose in her papers. 
I talked a lot and Joe said very little, which is always how our conversations go.  I tried to include him more at one point, but I don't think he was expecting me to turn the social workers questions toward him.  He handled it just fine though. 
Once we were done with our part the social worker look around the house with the kids.  She asked to see where they sleep and looked at some of their toys.  Nothing real en depth, just a glance around. 
She said she will be back about once a month, so I guess we will see her again soon!

When we did our foster care training they told us that there would be a lot of people involved and that our house would have a swinging door.  Well, they were not kidding.  We have a person that comes everyone week to spend time with the kids.  Their social worker will be coming at lest once a month, and today I got a call from their lawyer.  She will be coming over next week to check things out.  All these visits and they have only been here two week!