As I was sitting in the living room taking a break from cleaning, Alex is sitting next to me chatting my ear off. He's telling me what he wants, and talking all about how he does everything "mineself" (myself). I try to hold his hand to help him off the couch and he pushes my hand away. He yells out again "MINE SELF". Then he sees his potty book on the floor and remembers he just pooped on the potty, so he runs around cheering for himself "potty yeah potty yhea". I look at the wild man running back and forth, and it hits me! My baby is long gone! Tears start to flow and Alex looks at me and says "mama cryin", then he gives me the sweetest kiss. I try hard as I can to remember what it was like to have an infant. I can kind of remember because of the sleepless nights, and consent feedings, but I can not remember 3-9 months for anything. I try to remember what it was even like before he became this running, talking, climbing machine and it just wont come back to me.
We have been in survival mode for the last 4 months, but now it's time to get back to enjoying life. I start my new job in two weeks and I can not wait for things to slow down, and to have more time to enjoy my kids! I do not look forward to the day I am again sitting on the couch and I am crying my eyes out as I help Alex pick out his graduation announcements!
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